Starring Audrey

My newest blogworld addition is a weekly column I am now writing for Queercents called "Starring Audrey." It's my inaugural astrology column; in this case, focused on finance. I've always wanted to have a page in a magazine to fill with symbols and abstract instructions, as well as some saucy astro-humor and a sweet spot to promote my individualized astrology readings.

The other day I came across a bookmark I got as a child: Garfield with a bow(ne) and arrow as a classic Sagittarius. "Very expressive, has an open mind, is friendly and sincere. Can sometimes be irresponsible and tactless. Oh well, nobody's perfect," it reads. As anyone who knows me well is privy to, I have a longstanding relationship between Garfield and major life choices. I first decided to become a writer so I could focus on telling people about him. And now, putting the pieces together of my interest in astrology, here's this bookmark.

Lasagna-lug aside, I love sitting in front of a list of planets and degrees and signs and using my knowledge and intuition to understand the challenges and fortunes that lie ahead. It's a poetic act, reading the stars; and one with its own logic, which makes a hell of a lot more sense to me than other systems of thought. Someday, it'll happen for me, and a lifetime later I'll be in a pink Chanel suit with pearls, looking out dauntingly from the back pages of Vogue, warning to fellow members of my sign, "Cut back on the cheese this month, or Jupiter's gonna get you!"