Oscars 2010

Here are the votes I'd most like to make this year:

BEST PICTURE: "District 9." Avatar, schmavatar. Besides, we all know how I feel about claw hand.

ACTOR IN A LEADING ROLE: Sharlto Copley for "District 9."

ACTRESS IN A LEADING ROLE: Meryl Streep for "Julie & Julia." Who knew there was that much comedic genius in the gold standard of acting...and yet, who's surprised?

ACTRESS IN A SUPPORTING ROLE: Mo'Nique for "Precious." Also, Mo'Nique for "Phat Girlz," Mo'Nique for standup, and Mo'Nique for coolness.

ANIMATED FEATURE FILM: "Fantastic Mr. Fox." A most adorable and satisfying film from Wes Anderson.

DIRECTOR: Pedro Almodovar. I know, I know; he wasn't nominated. So what?

FOREIGN LANGUAGE FILM: "Broken Embraces."