Fun with Plagiarism

It has recently come to my attention that a former colleague has not only stolen and filmed a comedy short for a webseries that I wrote, but has also plagiarized a version of a personal bio I wrote for my website. While unfortunate that this individual has chosen to join the ranks of intellectual property thieves, I firmly believe that one's true voice will always be perceptible to anyone paying even an ounce of attention. I submit below the bio as written and mailed to several witnesses back in December, rendering it fully copyrighted material under the law.

Dear Reader,

As you will see from the photographs above, Audrey Dundee Hannah is neither a jaunty turn-of-the-century newspaper boy nor a bundle of twigs. She is a real-life actress, with human feelings. In addition, Audrey has done some things, including badly canoeing across small lakes and befriending woodland creatures. Also: acting. A member of the Screen Actors Guild, Audrey’s recent credits include webisodes for FOX and Verizon, an sketch comedy TV pilot, various independent films, and an MTV Movie Awards commercial which aired in theaters nationwide. She honed her on-camera skills at Actor’s Certified Training in North Hollywood; studied and performed comedy improvisation at the Upright Citizens Brigade Theater and Second City offshoot Off Off Campus at the University of Chicago; and workshopped her one-woman show at the Marsh in San Francisco. Audrey holds a B.A. in Drama from Stanford University, where she won the prestigious Eleanor Prosser prize, awarded for excellence in scholarship and performance. She also knows how to sew a nice red cape, which can be worn with mouse ears and is best seen in person.

See that cape in person, dear Reader.